November 30, 2012 – Homeward Bound – #trainspotting#Chicago


Good evening. On the, David Lynch inspired, 4:40PM out of the City. The NFI is 2. What a strange ride tonight. As I boarded the first car behind the engine, and the first car in the direction of travel, I was cut off (accidentally) at the entrance by the (here’s where the PC and the descriptive clash) dwarf (little person sounds stupid) on a blade/scooter similar to the one that each of my seven-year-old children want for Christmas. Surreal. I tried to be polite, but he just grunted and mumbled something about a Throne and getting laid.

There are two gentlemen sitting in the opposite jump seat. Both are very GQ/A&F. The key early-30’s demographic. By the way they sit, they are both rather tall – at least 6-foot 8-inches. They are both facing the direction of traffic and have a minimum 3″ distance between them that demarcates their individual personal space. Their ‘stuff’- bags, plastic water bottle, corporate-branded (NF) down layered coats – are on the other side of the jumpseat. One looks like a young George Michael, complete with close-fit dark maroon sweater, white t-shirt underneath, faded close cut jeans. The other fellow, very young-Rob-Lowe or Timothy Hutton, and more lithe like a runner, has a black t-shirt, black zipper sweater and slightly acid washed skinny jeans. As I sat down, Hutton was talking to Michael how he (Hutton) just doesn’t understand the IT staff, with their funny accents. He was about to emulate the stressful but comedic conversation he had today to his Chippendales coworker when he saw me sit down. I don’t know what came over him. I was certainly interested in the story, especially coming from two very Metrosexual white men. Oh well, I guess I’ll never know.

Young George Carlin is here. If you recall, this completely bald fellow has a trimmed down version of Carlin’s goatee from GC’s post rehab circa 1988. He is a frumpy man, our analog, married. He keeps the bald head warm with a brown plaid jockey-cap/beret. He is on his iCrackerberry, probably writing a blog of some sort. I would.

Also here this evening are an extremely tall and strong Karl Urban of Star Trek/McCoy fame, David Paymer, Subhas Chandra Bose, Anne Coulter, Carlos Mencia, and our good friend William F. Buckley. The cacophony of cell phones in a non quiet car sounds like a casino. Happy Friday. Enjoy the Weekend. Safe Travels.

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