April 30, 2013 – Homeward Bound – #trainspotting#Chicago

Good afternoon. On the, “Boing! Hello, Spring!” 3:55PM out of the City. I am in a fabulous mood. Going to the homestead in Western Suburbia, changing into comfortable clothes and walking, (gasp!) with my sons to the closest strip mall for some much needed grooming. Just the guys. Highlight of my afternoon. Well enough about my uncouthness. Let’s get right to it.

Sir Richard Harris’s stunt double is riding on the train this afternoon. The doppleganger of the now deceased (A Man Named) Horse and original Dumbledore from the first two HP movies is decidedly taciturn. Melancholy. Laconic. Bleh. Ever since Sir Richard passed away, out fellow traveller has had to go back to his day job as an accountant and stand-in for Sein Fein representatives visit Bridgeport. That little lucrative bit of terrorist activity ended with the peace treaty brokered by Bill Clinton, the Irish and the Brits under Tony Blair. Our man Horse is left with counting numbers on spreadsheets and reminiscing of days of the movie star treatment.

Porkins is back. Having actually survived the Gavin gambit against the original Death Star, he was convalescing in a retirement hone in Coruscant. After the New Republic came into power, and his body was healed , he got trapped in a wormhole (due to erroneous light speed calculations) which brought his long-distance, single-seat transport ship to Earth in 1982. He modded his transport into a makeshift RV, followed the Grateful Dead, sold bootlegs, invested in Apple, and is now wheeling and dealing futures on the CME. He looks happy.

Oh no. Harvey Keitel is here. He looks tired. Poor man has been spending his time in bit parts acting as a thug, a gangster (as opposed to gangsta), a con, or a cop. What he really wants to do is play Joseph in J&TATD, singing and dancing and showing up Donnie Osmond. He mist have recently killed his talent agent and disposed of the body next to Frank Nitti, Jimmy Hoffa, Sal Gian Ana and Moe Greene.

Also here are Benched War Correspondent, Basil Fawlty, Nazi Ark Hunter, Keith Swett, a dead Security Officer from Star Trek TOS, and Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde (reading a book and being quiet). All are armed.

Happy Tuesday. Safe Travels.

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