September 9, 2013 – Homeward Bound – #trainspotting#Chicago

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Good afternoon. On the “but for the grace of God” 3:55PM out of the City. I’m in my favorite spot with my favorite co commuters, and some newbies, too. Let’s get right to it.

The Historian is here. I once thought he was working on his piece de resistance, a comprehensive biography of James K Polk. I realize now that I was mistaken. He is channeling his inner (and outer) William H. Taft. Our scholar has gotten really big and looks decidedly unhappy about it.

Sitting across from me is a young fellow who reminds me of a South Boston street hoodlum. He is wearing blue jeans and a faded blue T-shirt with a “DANFEST ’07” logo on it. He, much like many of his age, sits in the bench with his waist jutting forward towards the end of the bench seat. If he were aroused, little Danfest would be pointing straight up. A seated slouch. That has to be uncomfortable. He doesn’t seem phased or afflicted with back pain.

In front of me and one seat over is Robin Thicke. The young handsome fellow has a five o clock shadow and an almost magical Pompadour hairdo. He’s like a cross between Ryan Seacrest with Ralph Macchio’s hair. The sunglasses and the ear buds make Robin SeaMacchio the absolute coolest guy in the train car.

Finally we come to Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde. For those of you who don’t remember, Dr. J-H is the Joe Torre looking late fifties gentleman that sits three seats from the entrance, on the window side, and has full on, lips moving but no noise come out, debates with himself.

When I sat down, he was in full on rant about how the Obama Administration has removed the power from Congress which is the real reason why Congress hasn’t been able to do it’s job and repeal Obamacare like it says in the Constitution. He wonders out loud (sort of) when he and his fellow self-debaters will be hauled off in front of a Death Panel to be decided upon by a team of godless sodomites and communists regarding his choices of doctor and specialists. No mention of the troubles in the middle east because he does not want to side with POTUS, though this side of his personality enjoys blowing up other small countries that claim to hate America because it says so in their 2000 year old book to hate America. In the original whateverthehell language that is. Al Gebra or whatever. Just as his centrist-progressive-right-RINO personality was about to come back and talk him down, an oriental woman sat down next to him, forcing him to control himself until later. So, I never got to see that part of the conversation.

Also here are Benched War Correspondent, Caucasian Barack Obama, and a desi Phil Collins (the Miami Vice years). All are armed.

Happy Monday. Safe travels.

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