Tuesday, March 4, 2014 – Homeward Bound – Mardi Gras – trainspottingChicago



Good evening.

Happy Mardi Gras! On the beaded 3:55PM out of the City. It is obvious that the Suburbanites in this car are without soul or happiness. In essence, they are all lapsed Catholics. Because only a practicing Catholic, or a die-hard hedonist, would dive into Mardi Gras as if it is the Ascension! Being an atheist, evidently I am not worthy enough to worship Satan, so I just enjoy the beads.

Well, enough about my faith. I left my iCrackerBot on my desk and only figured this out just as I entered the central station. I ran back to my office, swearing the whole time. The good news is that I am surrounded by friendly faces.

For example, there’s a fellow here that looks a lot like Bill Murray. He’s wearing a baseball hat and black, nondescript black jacket. He’s got a smile on his face, soaking in the polarized light seeping in through the triple-glazed polarized safety glass. As the light brightens our fellow’s face, he smiles just a bit brighter. If you could anthropomorphize a plant, the plant would smile and sigh under the same conditions. It is the perfect expression of hope in a continuing season of cold and frost (both environmentally and geopolitically).

Also here is a Robert Reich analog. The former Secretary of Labor under the Clinton administration has been the media mouthpiece, or at least cheerleader, for the Obama Administration’s economic policy. Our fellow has stimulated the local economy with at least three 16oz. cans of New Trend beer and a big bag of Bolts on Lewis popcorn. That’s enough to pay a regulation saddled school teacher for a full day managing thirty kids. Excellent.

Bald seems to be a thing. I count at least five bald heads napping, reading or staring out into space. All on purpose and not due to chemical or radiological therapies. Two are women (hear them roar!)

Also here are Kelly Ripa, the Union Soldier deserter hipster, a young Robert Bork, Julia Sweeney’s Pat character, and Ariel Sharon. All are armed.

The world is shifting again. If you blink, you may miss something.

Joyeux Mardi. Bon voyage!
Give it up for Lent (applause).

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