Tag Archives: Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde

Thursday, February 12, 2015 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

On the, best and brightest, 3:55PM out of the City.

A crowded front train car this early evening. My parents have been married for fifty years on this day. They wish to have the family out for dinner – pizza, as is their call – requiring me to get home and clean up.

It’s also “Darwin’s Day”. Charles Darwin was born on this day 206 years ago, February 12, 1809. Abraham Lincoln was also born on February 12, 1809. Coincidentally, my parents were married 156 years after their birth, and generated me six years, minus one day, later, in the land of Lincoln. I am an avowed Darwinist.

Correlation is not Causation but it’s nice to speculate.

Well, enough about me. Benched War Correspondent (BWC) is here l, and he is clean shaven, well dressed and looking out the window with a gleam in his eye.

Y’see, with the controversy surrounding veteran anchorman Brian Williams and his lapses in memory, BWC may actually get a promotion. The National network is looking for a confident, all American, family man type anchor. Though he may not be the first choice, his evening team staff are all in the running. Which means that while they are away at 30Rock,  screen testing, he can host the evening news. In prime time! He looks ecstatic in his brooding silence. He is on his way to his therapist to work on the PTSD and image projection issues he still is working through.

There is a woman here that reminds me of Angelica Huston, but without the glam and makeup. She looks like she’s desperately revisiting a time where she felt more beautiful, by catching up on the latest trends with a copy of Glamour magazine. Yet, instead of being interested in adopting some of the styles or advise presented, she is disappointed in the realization that she can’t “pull that look off” anymore. She puts the magazine away and starts playing with her bangs.

Also here are a disappointingly static Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde, Frieda Kahlo, Taye Diggs, Sen. Ted Cruz, and Mayor Rahm Emmanuel. All are armed.

Happy Darwin Day.
Safe travels.

January 28, 2015 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon. I’m on the, now legendary, 3:58PM out of the City. In my old stomping grounds – first car just behind the engine. I’m in my favorite jump seat, facing the crowd.

I got here a bit early so I could catch this seat. I’m hoping some of the old regulars will show up.

Caucasian Barack Obama is here. The young, handsome fellow is seated where I last left him, up on the second floor row of seats. His valise or backpack is on his lap. He has no earbuds on, so I am guessing he’s on his iCrackerBot, finishing off some work related correspondence. It’s possible CBO is ordering Indian food, as his doppelganger, the President of the United States, is finishing up his tour of India. It would be a happy coincidence if both got a slight bit of indigestion over some chicken tikka masala. A multiracial, international, Maalox moment.

Speaking of coincidence, my absolute favorite fellow commuter just got on the train. For those of you who have forgotten, Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is here – the Joe Torre looking fellow who talks to himself on the ride home. His mouth moves, but no sound escapes him in mid-self-rant. He is currently reading a commuter newsletter put out by the rail authority.

He’s aged a bit. The hair that was once a brownish blonde is now more gray than brown. At least he still has most of his hair. I am practically unrecognizable after almost a year, with less and less on my head.

Oh. Benched War Correspondent is here. He’s casually looking over the other commuters, nodding his head in disgust. With the Coalition forces mostly out of Iraq, and the December 31 pullout of Afghanistan, BWC has be regulated to covering the pre-2016 primary pre-parties. He can’t believe that the 114th Congress got in with nothing more than 33% of the electorate voting, and GOP leaders are calling this “a referendum” or that the “American People have spoken.” No, they haven’t. It is in part due to the ennui of politics itself and the lackluster selection of representatives. BWC goes back to his novel about a a pair of unknown reporters doing the groundwork investigations that ultimately unseat a corrupt official. You know….fiction.

Dr. Michiu Kaku of CUNY is here, reviewing a manuscript about global warming data. As expected, and accounting for every known control and theoretical outcome, and using repeated trials by different laboratories and repeatable model structures, the compilation of amassed knowledge points to the overconsumption of resources by humans as the probable cause for recent increases in atmospheric CO2 levels. Unfortunately, there are too many syllables in that last sentence for policy makers and wonks to finally understand that this can cannot and should not be kicked down to the next congress/president/poobah. He is banging on the laptop, trying to rewrite his byline, in the hopes that Sen. John Thune (R-SC), Rep. Lamar  Smith (R-Tx), and their respective staff will learn something about what’s happening in the nonpolitical world around them.

Oh. Here we go. Dr. J-H has finished reading his newsletter, and after staring out the window, decides to discuss the recent gathering of GOP nominees in Iowa earlier this week. His far-right persona can’t say enough about former half-Governor Sarah Palin, and how she is the perfect candidate to go up against Hillary Clinton. He doesn’t care about what the leftist media and the “supposed far-rightish Fox News” thinks of Sarah Palin’s chances, he got exact what she was talking about when she was on that podium on Saturday last. He stops, mid rant, and smiles. I do believe his far-right personality has a crush on the Woman of Wasilla.

His center right personality kicks in, just as the train pulls into the first stop. “Nonsense”, mouths this side of him. Who can be sure of a Hillary win? The current President won, twice! The first time, he beat a younger Hillary! What’s to say another (heh) dark horse doesn’t swoop in to run. How about Cory Booker? What if Condi Rice switches sides? We can’t call her on Gulf War 2, cause we supported that conflict!

He stops. He’s tired.

Also here are Christof Waltz, Louis CK, and Lance Armstrong. All are armed.

Happy Wednesday. Safe travels.

January 28, 2015 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon. I’m on the, now legendary, 3:58PM out of the City. In my old stomping grounds – first car just behind the engine. I’m in my favorite jump seat, facing the crowd.

I got here a bit early so I could catch this seat. I’m hoping some of the old regulars will show up.

Caucasian Barack Obama is here. The young, handsome fellow is seated where I last left him, up on the second floor row of seats. His valise or backpack is on his lap. He has no earbuds on, so I am guessing he’s on his iCrackerBot, finishing off some work related correspondence. It’s possible CBO is ordering Indian food, as his doppelganger, the President of the United States, is finishing up his tour of India. It would be a happy coincidence if both got a slight bit of indigestion over some chicken tikka masala. A multiracial, international, Maalox moment.

Speaking of coincidence, my absolute favorite fellow commuter just got on the train. For those of you who have forgotten, Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is here – the Joe Torre looking fellow who talks to himself on the ride home. His mouth moves, but no sound escapes him in mid-self-rant. He is currently reading a commuter newsletter put out by the rail authority.

He’s aged a bit. The hair that was once a brownish blonde is now more gray than brown. At least he still has most of his hair. I am practically unrecognizable after almost a year, with less and less on my head.

Oh. Benched War Correspondent is here. He’s casually looking over the other commuters, nodding his head in disgust. With the Coalition forces mostly out of Iraq, and the December 31 pullout of Afghanistan, BWC has be regulated to covering the pre-2016 primary pre-parties. He can’t believe that the 114th Congress got in with nothing more than 33% of the electorate voting, and GOP leaders are calling this “a referendum” or that the “American People have spoken.” No, they haven’t. It is in part due to the ennui of politics itself and the lackluster selection of representatives. BWC goes back to his novel about a a pair of unknown reporters doing the groundwork investigations that ultimately unseat a corrupt official. You know….fiction.

Dr. Michiu Kaku of CUNY is here, reviewing a manuscript about global warming data. As expected, and accounting for every known control and theoretical outcome, and using repeated trials by different laboratories and repeatable model structures, the compilation of amassed knowledge points to the overconsumption of resources by humans as the probable cause for recent increases in atmospheric CO2 levels. Unfortunately, there are too many syllables in that last sentence for policy makers and wonks to finally understand that this can cannot and should not be kicked down to the next congress/president/poobah. He is banging on the laptop, trying to rewrite his byline, in the hopes that Sen. John Thune (R-SC), Rep. Lamar  Smith (R-Tx), and their respective staff will learn something about what’s happening in the nonpolitical world around them.

Oh. Here we go. Dr. J-H has finished reading his newsletter, and after staring out the window, decides to discuss the recent gathering of GOP nominees in Iowa earlier this week. His far-right persona can’t say enough about former half-Governor Sarah Palin, and how she is the perfect candidate to go up against Hillary Clinton. He doesn’t care about what the leftist media and the “supposed far-rightish Fox News” thinks of Sarah Palin’s chances, he got exact what she was talking about when she was on that podium on Saturday last. He stops, mid rant, and smiles. I do believe his far-right personality has a crush on the Woman of Wasilla.

His center right personality kicks in, just as the train pulls into the first stop. “Nonsense”, mouths this side of him. Who can be sure of a Hillary win? The current President won, twice! The first time, he beat a younger Hillary! What’s to say another (heh) dark horse doesn’t swoop in to run. How about Cory Booker? What if Condi Rice switches sides? We can’t call her on Gulf War 2, cause we supported that conflict!

He stops. He’s tired.

Also here are Christof Waltz, Louis CK, and Lance Armstrong. All are armed.

Happy Wednesday. Safe travels.

Monday, September 15, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.
I’m on the 3:58PM out of the City.

Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is here. He is frustrated about something. He just went into a silent tirade. I can’t quite make out what’s bothering him, but it is either the recent half-measures proposed by the POTUS about ISIL in Iraq, or he is reenacting a particularly animated breakup with an office romance that happened in 1983.

He seems to be lecturing his window mirror image about how the Unites States has behaved poorly over the last decade or more, making either too rash or too timid decisions about foreign policy and US interests throughout the world.

Or, he seems to be arguing with Uniqua about a reckless dalliance with a bisexual cabaret dancer in 1983, at a time where everyone in the office pool is noticing that they are acting more and more like a married couple every day, but that Uniqua’s family, former Civil Rights activists and Black Power advocates, would not be pleased to have her bring him, a young baseball player looking pasty faced, back to Greensville, Alabama for Thanksgiving.

He stares out into the green-gray haze of the afternoon sky, through the triple glazed safety windows, reminiscing about the halcyon days of the Reagan Administration.

Three Desi IT fellows decided that they felt most comfortable. They are comparing breakfast bunch places in the Western Suburbs. One fellow is the “foodie”; the other two are misers. One goes to the nicer places for the experience. The other two are trying to get the most for their money. My wife would love this conversation. I stay quiet, with headphones in my head.

Also here are Jeffrey Dahmer, Clive Owen, Katey Segal, Will Farrell, and Harvey Keitel. The are armed.

Happy Monday. Safe travels.

Monday, September 8, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

I’m on the most favored 3:58PM out of the City, in the front train car just behind the locomotive. You may have noticed that I haven’t been talking about the morning trains recently. I think that pattern is due to a bit of laziness on my part, coupled with a habit of keeping abreast of the weekend current events and associated satire, as I travel into the City. I will make a point to report my observations about the inbound folks in De course.

It’s a lightly populated train car this afternoon. Jay Cutler is here. He doesn’t seem disappointed in the three point loss to the Buffalo Bills in yesterdays Season Opener. He, like me and many of my friends, were pleasantly surprised that it was only a three point loss. The loss, this time, can be squarely attributed to the three interceptions (nowadays called “turnovers” like the savory puff pastry) deftly executed by Cutler.

Our man pulls out a pack of menthol cigarettes, but quickly puts them back in his pocket, realizing that he can’t smoke on the train without reprisals and media scrutiny. He falls asleep to the rhythm of the train, reliving every open receiver he could have hit to instead of their defensive backs.

Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is here. He’s talking to the back of the head of the young, Telly Savalas looking, bald fellow seated in front of him. J-H is a little miffed about the state of the GOP.

On one level, it looks like the GOP will take back the House and win over the Senate. Happy days are here again, right? In the name of the American Family, they can repeal the destructive healthcare law that just doesn’t help average Americans. They can finally shut Elizabeth Warren and the Dems about profiting from Student Loans. After all, everyone knows Government should act more like Big Business. What better way to generate profit to reinvest in the debt reduction?

Increase sending rates to banks? asks his RINO personality, to the row of hair growing along Kojack’s neckline in front of him. Are you crazy? retorts Far Right, to the same hairline. Do you want to encumber growth? Stifle job creation? Kill the American Dream? Have we lost our minds?

He looks out the window to his right, contemplating that last question, in silence.

Also here are Clive Owen, Freddie Prinze Sr., the Hong Kong money launderer from The Dark Knight, and Rita Rudner. All are armed.

Happy Monday. Safe travels.

Friday, September 5, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

I’m on the 3:58PM out of the City. I am sipping a beer as I ride the train home. A rare indulgence. Fat Tire, out of Colorado, and in keeping with my morphology, if you were curious.

I did a rare thing today. I took a photo, earlier, of a co-commuter. It was her hair, which strangely reminded me of 18th Century France during the time of Le Roi, Louis XIV. I have made all attempts to highlight the hair while masking the persons face. Quite frankly, I cannot tell from this distance if it is a later middle aged woman of Mediterranean extraction, or Chief Judge Antonin Scalia in drag. Here’s the manipulated photo.

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I love her hair. In the train car, it is the most natural and distinctive visual stimulus available. Well…the first stimulus, at least.

Speaking of visuals, there are two women chatting, some five seats back. The one on my left, aisle side, is very pretty. Probably late thirties, kids in school. Her friend is a bit older, early forties, growing gracefully into middle age. Window seat has bigger cheeks, a larger but not unhealthy frame, curly blonde hair.

Aisle seat is an elf by comparison. Kristen Bell with more angular features and brown hair. She reminds me of an unrequited college crush I once had. Aisle’s aura shines with power and stability. Very cool.

Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is very quiet. His far right self is probably brooding over the Ukraine-East Ukraine-Russian peace negotiations and how its conveniently happening as President BHO is in the Baltic for the NATO summit. His far right side will perk up saying “the US had nothing to do with it”, while his RINO is countering with ” We have roughly 5% of the US population just two generations away from the Ukraine and the Baltic States. We have military bases within pissing distance of Ukraine’s western border. No, we had nothing to do with that.” He looks out the window, contemplating the sarcasm in his own head(s).

Also here are Benched War Correspondent, young Chuck Norris, Woody Allen, Rosa Parks, Hank Greene, and Ally Sheedy. All are heavily armed.

Happy Friday. Safe travels.

Friday, September 5, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

I’m on the 3:58PM out of the City. I am sipping a beer as I ride the train home. A rare indulgence. Fat Tire, out of Colorado, and in keeping with my morphology, if you were curious.

I did a rare thing today. I took a photo, earlier, of a co-commuter. It was her hair, which strangely reminded me of 18th Century France during the time of Le Roi, Louis XIV. I have made all attempts to highlight the hair while masking the persons face. Quite frankly, I cannot tell from this distance if it is a later middle aged woman of Mediterranean extraction, or Chief Judge Antonin Scalia in drag. Here’s the manipulated photo.

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I love her hair. In the train car, it is the most natural and distinctive visual stimulus available. Well…the first stimulus, at least.

Speaking of visuals, there are two women chatting, some five seats back. The one on my left, aisle side, is very pretty. Probably late thirties, kids in school. Her friend is a bit older, early forties, growing gracefully into middle age. Window seat has bigger cheeks, a larger but not unhealthy frame, curly blonde hair.

Aisle seat is an elf by comparison. Kristen Bell with more angular features and brown hair. She reminds me of an unrequited college crush I once had. Aisle’s aura shines with power and stability. Very cool.

Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is very quiet. His far right self is probably brooding over the Ukraine-East Ukraine-Russian peace negotiations and how its conveniently happening as President BHO is in the Baltic for the NATO summit. His far right side will perk up saying “the US had nothing to do with it”, while his RINO is countering with ” We have roughly 5% of the US population just two generations away from the Ukraine and the Baltic States. We have military bases within pissing distance of Ukraine’s western border. No, we had nothing to do with that.” He looks out the window, contemplating the sarcasm in his own head(s).

Also here are Benched War Correspondent, young Chuck Norris, Woody Allen, Rosa Parks, Hank Greene, and Ally Sheedy. All are heavily armed.

Happy Friday. Safe travels.

Monday, August 25, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

I’m on the 3:58PM out of the City. I’m in the front car. I missed the old neighborhood enough that I came back to it. All my old friends are here.

For example, Clive Owen is seated two seats over. His temples have grayed since I saw him last, but he looks as handsome as ever. He is, as usual, fixated upon his iCrackerBot, which he is tethered using the proscribed earbuds provided by the manufacturer, as opposed to a high end, mini-subwoofer augmented, air traffic controller certified set of noise isolating headphones. Pfft. He’s such a Philistine! How can he expect to have an all inclusive, three dimensional, polyphonic immersive experience with a simple set of rural Chinese made plastic ear wax removers? Rube.

Benched War Correspondent is back. He’s been at the office e since 4:00AM, going over the influx of police brutality claims, both video-recorded and witness-corroborated, in the hopes of understanding the cultural reasons for this surge of excessive enforcement procedures. He’s looking out the window, contemplatively. Is it possible, in the name of “infotainment”, the Fourth Estate has contributed to the elevated fear of non-white folk?Is the acceptance of, and open publication of, rhetoric reminiscent of Jim Crow? Is he wondering about the effects of publishing leading questions instead of real facts?

(See what I did there?)

Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is here. I love this man. He is my muse. I used to be in an academic/sociological, Louis Leakey like observer of our Homo sapien polysyllabus friend, but now I have embraced his eccentricities from afar. I understand how he uses books and printed material to keep him from “riding the window ” into silent , self satisfying exposition. I feel that this blog is a digital manifestation of what Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde demonstrates on a daily basis. When he is busy, or engaged in reading, or has a date (yes, I’ve seen that!), he comes of as an affable, likable, engaging conversationalist. When alone, with nothing to engage his mind, he turns inward, staring out the train window as less of a snapshot of a moving landscape, but a blurry dysfunctional mirror by which to speak to the only reasonable person he trusts, to figure out the chaos of the world he experiences or perceives.

My hero.

Also here are a bald John Lithgow, Spike Lee, Adam Savage, Dr. Billy Geer, and Carl Sagan. All are armed.

Dr. Who for me at 9:30PM tonight. Movie theater. No date! Somebody has to watch the companions and keep my TARDIS from disappearing, while I check out the latest iteration of the Doctor.

Happy Monday. Safe travels.

Friday, August 22, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

On the discombobulating 3:55PM out of the City. I’m in the historic first car, in the jump seat so that I can see everything. My back is to the diesel engine pulling the thirteen car express away from the City and out to the suburbs.

Discombobulating because it’s been awhile since I’ve seen my absolutely favorite co-commuter, Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde. The Joe Torre look alike is looking fantastic. He just sat down and is reading a pamphlet or newsletter.

A bit of history for the three newcomers to this blog. Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is a late-fifties or early-sixties aged man who has the strange habit of talking to himself out loud, but silently. Oddly enough, the people around him never seem to notice or acknowledge this singular, public behavior. We’ll come back to J-H in a bit. The train is still at the station. We have another five or so minutes before we leave.

Benched War Correspondent is here. Again, the fellow looks like an amalgam of Tom Brokaw, Stone Phillips, and Anderson Cooper. He looks like he’s much more comfortable in khakis and riding the roof of an interregional train in India or South Africa than as a commuter in the Midwest.

After the death of James Foley, he is not skittish, but antsy to get back out and report on ISIS, the Bashir Al Assad government in Syria, or even tension in Nigeria over Ebola. He looks at his cell phone, thinking, “I should be in Ferguson, or L.A., or looking for the missing girls in Nigeria, or somewhere, anywhere but here.”  BWC looks out the window with sadness and frustration. I half hear him humming “Somewhere Over The Rainbow” as the train pulls out of the station.

Oh. Speaking of being somewhere else, the movement of the train has Jeckyl-Hyde kicking into full debate mode. He is looking out the window and whispering about something. His center-right, or RINO voice, has started with a question to his far right Tea Partied mind about the continued unrest in Ferguson, MO, just Northwest of St. Louis. He is trying to explain how the actions of one police officer have opened up a local problem, a problem that is an allegory to the ongoing racial tensions across the country.

The tea started boiling back in J-H, who is getting more animated at his reflection in the window. (Actually, it’s pretty bright outside, so whatever he sees are shadows of the commuters across the aisle reflected in the window.) His far right voice is equally frustrated at the residents of Ferguson. Why gather? Why riot? Why destroy property? He immediately understands that the officer used excessive force. Far right even understands how poorly local and state government has handled the aftermath, at least as presented in all the media outlets (the liberal left and the fair-and-balanced shops).

Why can’t all folk just follow the rules?

He fell silent – or at least stop being animated. I think because he just realized something. He realized that the shooting some seven days ago of Michael Brown was an example of government using excessive force over an unarmed citizen. This is, of course, the very same argument that the NRA uses in defending the Second Amendment of the US Constitution. If government takes away guns, then we citizens can’t defend ourselves agents an oppressive government. Given that logic, why haven’t the NRA advocated for the citizens of Ferguson, who are protesting peacefully, to instead take up arms against an oppressive government entity like the Ferguson Police, as the Second Amendment and the Founding Fathers intended?

“To secure these [inalienable] rights [to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness], governments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed… Whenever any form of government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the right of the people to alter or abolish it, and to institute new government, laying its foundation on such principles, and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their safety and happiness.” –Thomas Jefferson: Declaration of Independence, 1776.

He is staring out the window, unmoving, silent, contemplating how he has quoted Jefferson, the Deceleration of Independence, and key bits of the Constitution, but only in the abstract and in the safety of his own reasoning. When legally and logically applying these “unalienable rights” to an actual event and the aftermath, it’s amazing that the USA hasn’t had a more violent history of government regiem change.  He closes his eyes, and shivers.

Also here are R Kelly, Slats Grobnick, an Accardo hitman, Mary Louise Parker, and H.R. Haldeman. All are armed.

Happy Friday. Safe travels.

Thursday, October 24, 2013 – Homeward Bound – #trainspotting#Chicago

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Good afternoon . On the 3:58PM out of the City. Let’s get right into it.

Frank Gorshin is sitting up top and looking at his iCrackerBot. He’s plugged in with the ear buds. Who is Frank Gorshin? He was one of the preeminent entertainers, character actors and mimics of the 1960’s through 1980’s or so. His claim to fame in popular culture was playing the very popular Riddler on the campy 1960’s “Batman” TV Show. Riddler was by far the more popular and more scary villains of that era of the Batman’s history.

Frank Gorshin’s Riddler laugh still haunts me today. If Central Casting at Desilu had any sense, and ever conferred with DC, Gorshin would have been the Joker and put Caesar Romero in the Riddler spot. Gorshin made Riddler infamous for a time.

Our Gorshin analog is watching Lois&Clark reruns on Netflix.

For those of you not comic book enthusiasts but are avid readers, give comic books and graphic novels a second look. In DC Universe, the Riddler was at best a second rate villain to the Dark Knight Detective. The Joker was always considered the deadliest, most insane, most creepy villain for Batman; some say in all of fiction. Gorshin could have done wonders to Joker that would have made Nicholson’s and Ledger’s renditions even creepier. Thankfully, Mark Hamill’s Joker form the 1990’s outstanding Batman-The Animated Series infused a bit of Frank Gorshin in the performance – Mark Hamill being the natural voiceover successor – and current reigning genius – to Frank.

Ok. Fanboy moment over.

Train just left the station. A slightly chunkier Hugh Grant is sitting two seats down and across the aisle. Given Hugh Grant’s open jihad against pavanatzis…
..no, Pavarotti…
..no no…paparazzi…

That’s It!…paparazzi, I wonder how he would feel about me making stuff up about a guy that looks like him only because I say this guy looks like him (Hugh Grant)? That is the riddle wrapped in an enigma! And I just made a JFK-Oliver Store reference two days after the fiftieth anniversary of the JFK assassination. Mind blown.

Bruce Jenner, just off of his 1977 Wheaties commercial tour, is here. He has sketch pad (a real one, not electronic) with the binding at the top instead of the sides, making copious notes. He is looking decidedly productive for 4:15PM on a Thursday. In a twitch of brain-reset, he deftly closed his pad, puts his analog system away, pulls out a d’Anjou Sky-Volume, logs in and, as the electronic device starts up right up against his denim covered man-privates, is busily cueing Rod Stewart on his iCrackerBot, connected to his head with certified iSpuds. The quasi-epileptic parts of my brain are already in Grand-Mal mode just watching this fellow. He is the fastest commuter alive.

And just like that, I made a Flash reference. My fanboy is sated.

Also here are Linda Carter, Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde, a very young Bill Cosby, young Jay Cutler, Sir Richard Harris, and Benched War Correspondent. All are well armed.

I’m staying home tomorrow to be my wife’s slave. I am looking forward to it.

Have a good weekend. Safe Travels.